Two Perfect Heartbeats

We had ultrasound #2 today with Dr. Ahlering.  We were able to see the heartbeat of each baby on the ultrasound screen, and Dr. A was able to measure each baby's rate.  It was truly amazing . . .  unreal.  It is so early in the pregnancy that it just seems so crazy that these tiny little babies already have my blood pumping through their little bodies.  What a wonderful moment.  

We got some more ultrasound pictures, but they are a little redundant if you saw the pictures I posted last week.  Dr. A said that everything looked great.  I am supposed to finish all of my medications through May 13th and I need to get an appointment with an OB in Columbia.  That is my big project for this next week.   

I swore if I ever got pregnant that I wouldn't complain about morning sickness and nausea, so I hope this doesn't sound like a complaint.  I had almost no nausea until Monday of this week.  I felt slightly nauseous on and off all day Monday.  Then, yesterday, I was nauseous all day and all night.  Today was a lot better.  I have tried a couple of home remedies like ginger and sour candy.  I don't think it is going to be a big problem.  I haven't vomited, so that is a plus.  

The pregnancy symptom that is wreaking the most havoc on my life is fatigue.  I am so tired all of the time.  I have never felt so tired in all of my life.  It is 7:00 right now and I would seriously consider going to bed.  But, it is all so great.  I am thankful for every little bit of it.

OLEVA REPORT

Mom had round #3 of chemo yesterday in Columbia.  I was not able to take her, so her sister, Carla, took her.  She started having some pain in her leg Monday and it was worse yesterday.  Unfortunately, it turned out to be a blood clot in her leg.  They put her on coumadin and she has to give herself Heparin injections at home for the next several days to try to break up the clot.  Most likely it is a side effect of the chemo drugs, but they are doing some blood tests to rule out any disorder that may lead to blood clots.  She had blood clots in her legs about 30 years ago, too.  

It was giving her quite a bit of pain yesterday.  She was limping, but she said it is feeling better today.  She did not work today and she probably will not work tomorrow either.  She was trying to lay around most of the day with her leg up.  She said that she felt much better after chemo #3 than she did after chemo #2.  That was great.  The next round of chemo will be in two weeks, on Tuesday, May 12.  

Thanks for reading!

6 Weeks Pregnant

I am officially 6 weeks pregnant today.  I know that most people do not start showing until the end of the first trimester, but I am already starting to show.  It must be the twins.  See for yourself.

As the Plan is Revealed

I have spent a lot of time over the past several months (and years) speculating about God's plan for my family.  I have known for the past three years that He has a specific plan for Dave and myself that would reveal itself in good time.  The problem with that  -  I am an impatient person that prefers to be in control.  I am striving to improve this negative quality.  It is my personal mission to no longer be described as a "control freak" one day in the future . . .  maybe the distant future.  I am still a realist.

The plan is becoming more and more obvious on a daily basis.  It's pretty simple.  My beautiful mother is going through the most challenging event of her life - breast cancer.  I hope that this is the most difficult thing that she ever experiences.  I can't imagine her going through anything scarier.  She says that anything like this happening to any of her children would be worse.  Every mother appreciates that.  Through all of the chemo treatments, fatigue, lack of appetite, baldness . . .  she has a light at the end of the tunnel.  She will be a grandma soon.  She will receive a gift that she has been patiently awaiting for years (and years).  

I have never seen her so happy in all of my life.  Isn't it ironic?  She is still receiving cards from friends, acquaintances, and neighbors regularly.  People that barely know her ask me about her every day.  She is so lucky to be a part of such a wonderful, caring community.  I know that her heart is full of appreciation and gratitude.  It has all been very unexpected.  

She encountered her first major obstacle on Friday, April 17th.  She had been losing her hair that entire week and her wig finally arrived that day.  So, she made a trip to her salon and had her head shaved.  It was very upsetting to her.  She hates it.  It was nothing less than traumatic.  Her wig is beautiful - but couldn't be more uncomfortable.  She says that the entire time that it is on her head she is thinking about it.  "It feels like I am wearing a stocking cap."  

So, she has been wearing scarves on her head instead.  She came to Kirksville yesterday and we found some really pretty silk scarves that will work great.  She usually forgets that the scarves are on her head until someone looks at her funny.  That is a reminder.  I know that this process is so very difficult for her, but she is handling it with grace.   I know that she is happy.  I know that she feels very loved.  I know that she will get through it.  

She still has a long road, but she has that wonderful gift waiting at the end.  She will get there.

I want to share some pictures from her last chemo treatment that was on April 14 in Columbia.  We celebrated my 31st birthday with Jeff that day.

Two For the Price of One

Count them.  TWO.  That is the number of babies I am currently carrying.  Dave and I are thrilled to learn that we are going to have twins - assuming both babies stay healthy.  Please pray that both babies stay healthy.  Our ultrasound went very well this morning.  Dr. Ahlering gave me an A+.  He said that everything looked perfect.  He did not measure for a due date, but according to the dates of the egg retrieval and embryo transfer, I am 5 weeks, 2 days along.  That puts my due date somewhere around December 21.  Of course, I probably will not carry twins to full term.  

I also had my final intralipid infusion today to prevent my immune system from attacking the babies.  I expressed a concern to Dr. A that perhaps we should do at least one or two more intralipid infusions and he stated that he felt comfortable calling today's infusion the final one.  That sounded just peachy to me.  

I am continuing with my daily dexamethasone and baby aspiring pills until May 16.  I will continue my prenatal vitamins, of course.  I am also continuing with my daily progesterone supplements and injections of hCG every Monday, Wednesday, & Friday and injections of progesterone every 3rd day also until May 16.  I will be so happy when we are finished with all of the injections.

We will return to Dr. Ahlering's office next Wednesday, April 29th for ultrasound #2.  He said that we should be able to hear/see heart beats.  He also said that if everything looks good next week, he will probably release me to a regular OB.  I need to start looking for a good OB/GYN in Columbia.  Any ideas?  

Dr. Ahlering also released me to exercise today.  I am thrilled about that.  To run or not to run . . .  That is the question.  I am wavering on this one.  I may wait until I am out of my first trimester to run.  I don't want to have any regrets, but I do want to stay in shape.  I think I will do a lot of walking, yoga, Wii Fit, some strength training for my legs.  

You are all so amazing to show such sincere concern and excitement for us.  We feel like our dream is finally coming true.  I know that the prayers and support from each and every one of you has contributed to our success.  We are so lucky to have such wonderfully supportive family and friends.  Don't forget us when we are elbow deep in diapers.  We will need lots of support then, too.

Update

I am sorry that I haven't posted for so long.  In this case, no news is good news.  Dave and I are leaving this afternoon to go to St. Louis.  My first ultrasound appointment is tomorrow, Wednesday, April 22 at 8:30 am with Dr. Ahlering at the Sher Institute.  Of course, I will update you all ASAP with the findings.  

Dave and I decided that we would head down this afternoon and scope out some maternity and baby furniture stores.  YEAY!  I am embarrassed to report that I am going to have to get some maternity clothes sooner than later.  I have gained 6 pounds in the last 6 weeks.  It is not just because I am pregnant.  It is because the steroids and hormones make me eat like the Cookie Monster.  I am always hungry.  I have never been so hungry in all of my life.  

Wish us luck tomorrow!

It's Getting Better & Better

     I will spare you all of the details, but I have been having some symptoms since the weekend that could be normal pregnancy symptoms (especially with twins) or they could be indicative of a miscarriage.  Dave and I have been very nervous about this with each passing day, and I have spent some time communicating back and forth with my nurse and my doctor about it.  They have made some medication changes and they really don't seem to be too worried about it.  

     To ease my mind, they recommended a third blood draw to have my quantitative beta hCG levels checked again.  For all of you that don't know what that is, it is the pregnancy hormone that makes a home pregnancy test positive.  The number will double every 2 days if you are pregnant.  My number was 37 on Friday, 198 on Monday and 521 today!!!  This is very good.  It has eased our concerns (a little).  Dave says he will continue to be somewhat concerned until the ultrasound on Wednesday.  

     The good news is that I get to start taking a new shot.  That was sarcasm.  Now I will get a subcutaneous injection of hCG every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.  We will also continue with the horrible (I am not exaggerating) IM injections of progesterone every third day.  I will continue to do this through May 13.  I will be 9 weeks at that point and most likely I will graduate to a regular OB at that time.  I will continue to see Dr. Ahlering in St. Louis regularly up until that point.  

     So, today is the best birthday I have ever had.  I have never had so much to be thankful for.  And my wonderful husband bought me beautiful flowers and diamond earrings.  He always makes my birthday special.  I got flowers from two other unbelievably great friends.  You know who you are.  I love you.  

WoW!!

I hate to do it again, but I might get a little emotional in this blog.  Since finding out that we are pregnant yesterday, I have been completely overwhelmed with the outpouring of support.  I am not able to express how much this support means to both myself and Dave.  It is absolutely unbelievable.  It is becoming obvious to me that your thoughts and prayers have led us to this positive outcome.  

We are not out of the woods yet, because I am only 5 weeks along and we have had difficulty early in pregnancy before, but we are trying to stay as positive as we can.  My first ultrasound is scheduled at SIRM with Dr. Ahlering on Wednesday, April 22nd.  If everything goes well at the ultrasound, we will definitely sigh in relief.  If there is more than one little Briggs baby, we will find that out on Wednesday, as well.  

OLEVA REPORT:

I went with Mom to Columbia today for chemo #2.  She has been doing very well.  She even insisted on making Easter dinner on Sunday.  Her hair just started thinning a couple of days ago.  She has had some other symptoms:  fatigue, heartburn, forgetfulness.  But overall, she is doing great.  Her attitude is so positive.  I think the baby news will help her through this process.  The next chemo is in two weeks on Tuesday, April 28th.  

Jeff and Mom took me to a nice birthday dinner at Sophia's in Columbia tonight.  We had a lot to celebrate.  

WE ARE PREGNANT!!!

We are so excited. It seems too good to be true. But we are definitely 100% pregnant. My hCG number on Friday was 37 and today it was 198. It is supposed to double every two days if you are pregnant and it more than doubled. Dave and I are both very excited, but it is hard not to worry just a little, because we have lost previous pregnancies at this point. I haven't spoken to my doctor's office yet, but when I do I will give you more info. I think I will be going to St. Louis for an ultrasound next week. We should know more then . . . like is there one or two little Briggs babies in there. The hCG numbers indicate that there may be more than one. Thanks for all of your love and support. It helped us get to this point.

Relaxin' & Implantin'

In case anyone is still checking out the blog regularly, I thought I should post something - even if it is boring.  It is Monday afternoon and I am just sitting around . . .  relaxin'.  I have been doing a lot of nothing since Saturday morning.  I have eaten five meals purchased from fast food restaurants or delivery - all junk.  I have almost completely caught up on my DVR, but sadly, I haven't opened a book.  Maybe I will finish Marley & Me this afternoon.  I finally took a shower this morning - it had been 48 hours since the previous one.  

Today is day 7 following fertilization.  Today is likely the day that embryo implantation (into the uterus wall) will occur.  So, that is why I am doing nothing.  I want to help my little embryos along the best that I can.  No regrets.  So, for that reason, I don't mind sitting around doing nothing.  I have had some cramping symptoms consistent with implantation, but it could be from the progesterone injections or it could all be in my head.  

Below are some pictures of embryo implantation.

I found out this morning that I can have my blood drawn for the pregnancy tests at the hospital lab in Kirksville.  I will be doing that Friday of this week and the Monday after Easter.  So, we will know if our little science experiment worked on Monday of next week.  

OLEVA REPORT

When I spoke to Mom yesterday, she was doing great.  She got up and made a big breakfast that she ate.  She had a great appetite.  She felt great.  Earlier in the week she was getting hiccoughs every time she ate.  That was annoying.  During the week, she never felt awful, but she didn't feel like herself until yesterday.  She has a busy week at work this week, so I am hoping that she feels great all week.

Meet our Little Ones

We transferred two "perfect" Grade 1 blastocysts to my uterus this morning.  The picture above is an actual image of the two blasts that are resting in my uterus right now.  AREN'T THEY BEAUTIFUL?!!!  We have given them the nicknames Jem & Scout.  A LITTLE QUIZ:  Does anyone know where we found those names?  I know they are odd names.  We do not plan on using them for our actual offspring.  We just thought it would be fun to have nicknames.  I will explain the names a little bit further if anyone knows where they came from.

This is the ultrasound picture Dr. A took immediately after the transfer.  The majority of the picture shows my uterus and the arrow is pointing to a little white dot.  Can you see it?  It is tiny.  The blastocysts are in a fluid that shows up as the white dot on the ultrasound.  

Before we spoke to Dr. A this morning, the nurse coordinator, Mary came in and told us that we had three "perfect" Grade 1 blastocysts.  She explained that we had the option to transfer all three of them if we chose.  I expressed that I was leaning towards two and Dave was considering three, if  that is what Dr. A recommended.  What was he thinking??  She told us that we should talk it over and discuss it with Dr. A when he comes in.  

I proceeded to try to persuade my lawyer of a husband that we shouldn't even consider transferring three.  He, of course, used his litigation skills to discount me.  (That is how I felt.  I am sure he will say that is not how it went down.)  I then told him that if we had triplets, I would be forced to quit my job.  He thought that was ridiculous.  Will anyone back me up here?  

Dr. A settled the disagreement.  He said we were going to transfer two.  He gave us no option.  He is a sensible man.  They froze the third blastocyst today.  There were several other blastocysts that they referred to as "early blasts".  That means that they haven't completely matured.  They will look at them tomorrow and if they look good, they will freeze as many as possible.  

The procedure was uncomfortable, to say the least - both physically and from an exposure standpoint.  I am now officially on bedrest until 10:30 Sunday morning.  I am typing this on the laptop in bed.  I think I will lay around most of the day tomorrow and continue to do very little physically Monday and Tuesday.  Wednesday it will be back to work for me.  

I just want to complain for a moment.  I hope you don't mind.  I currently (and for the past two weeks) have the appetite of a 16 year old boy.  Dave is completely surprised by how much food I am throwing back.  I am not even pregnant yet.  The steroid and hormones are causing this.  I typically have a sweet tooth, but I am craving fried and cheesy melty foods.  

I have eaten more fast food in the past two weeks than I have in the past six months.  I can't get enough.  Dave is picking up our dogs right now and he is going to pick some Taco Bell up for me on his way home.  I just ate enough leftovers to comprise a full meal less than two hours ago.  

The other complaint (I know you can't wait) is that I haven't been able to exercise AT ALL since the egg retrieval on Monday, March 30th.  I will not be exercising again until at least April 13, maybe even the 21st, possibly longer, if I do become pregnant.  This is not a good thing for my mental health status.  I LOVE to run.  

And, in fact, if we get a big fat negative result with this cycle, I will be running my first half marathon on April 19th in St. Louis.  Therefore, I will have no opportunity for anymore long runs prior to the race.  Of course, if I am pregnant, I will not be running the race, so I am hoping that I can't run it.  I am sorry about this rant.  Dr. A did tell me that he thinks I can resume my normal running routine if I don't have any complications during my pregnancy.  I was happy to hear that.  My normal routine doesn't include training for a half-marathon - just short runs.

By the way, I will have two blood pregnancy tests.  They will be on Friday, April 10 and Monday, April 13.  They do a quantitative hCG test and the number should at least double every two days.  So, we will know if I am pregnant the day after Easter.  I know that the typical protocol is not to share that you are pregnant for the first trimester, but we will be throwing that out the window, because it seems cruel to drag you all into this and then withhold that little bit of info.  

I'm sorry this post is so long.  I had a lot to share.  Thanks for thinking about us today.  

Back to St. Louis

I got a call from Mary at SIRM this morning that they want to do the blastocyst transfer tomorrow morning (Saturday) at 9:30 am.  Therefore, Dave and I are packing up and leaving for St. Louis this afternoon, around 3:00.  We will spend the night there tonight and come home after the procedure tomorrow.  So, we will get a tasty meal tonight in St. Louis.  I will have a lot of information after the transfer tomorrow - and a lot of time on my hands, as I am not going back to work until Wednesday.  So, you will probably get a long post from me tomorrow evening.  I think we will even get pictures of our little guys.  I will share them if we get them.  

Love you all lots!

Mounds of Syringes

The pictures says it all.  I emptied our sharps container to take this picture.  These are the syringes that were used during our IVF cycle.  Dave is giving me another injection tonight of IM progesterone.  He actually does not find joy in this shot, because it is intramuscular and the needle is a .22 gauge.  It is huge and very painful.  He shows a little sympathy.  My hip still hurts from the progesterone injection that he gave me on Monday.  Again, it will all be worth it in the end.  

10 Little Embryos

I FINALLY heard from Andrea this morning. We have 10 embryos.  So far, they all have made it. I can't believe it. They grade them based on how they look microscopically. Grade 1 is the best and I think Grade 3 is the worst, maybe Grade 4. We have one that is a Grade 1 and all 9 others are a Grade 2. They range from 7 cells to more than 10 cells. She told me that 7-9 cells are ideal for today. The 10-celled little guys are moving a little too fast. They get that from me.

This means we will be going to St. Louis on Saturday for our blastocyst transfer. I will be on bed rest for 24 hours following the transfer, but Dr. A said Dave could drive me home following the procedure. I have decided not to work Monday. So, some of my patients are going to have to be rescheduled. I hate that, but I have to do what I have to do. My poor loyal patients probably think I have skipped the country. Tuesday is my day off, so I will basically lay around and do nothing Saturday through Tuesday. That will be interesting. I keep saying this again and again - It will be worth it.

In case you missed the post where I showed a picture of a day-3 embryo, I thought I would attach another picture, so you can see what our little guys look like.  This one would be considered a perfect 8-celled grade 1 embryo.  We didn't have any that were quite this perfect.

Oleva Report

Mom stayed home from work yesterday just to take it easy.  She really didn't feel too bad at all.  She said she felt like she was made out of lead yesterday . . .  really weighed down or heavy.  It is hard to explain.  She also felt a little queasy and didn't have much of an appetite, but she ate a little something anyway.  She had to go to the hospital in Memphis for a shot of Nulasta.  It restores her white blood cell count, so that she can do chemo every 2 weeks.  It was supposed to cause a lot of bone and joint pain, but she has had no symptoms at all.  She went to work today.  She says she feels a little shaky and queasy, but not too bad.  

Missy came over yesterday after she got off work and we went out for Chinese food and saw a movie, The Knowing.  I wouldn't recommend that movie at all.  It was so bad it was funny.  And it wasn't meant to be funny.  Missy said I can pick the movie next time.  It was great to hang out with you, Missy.  Thanks for driving all of the way over here just to hang out.   

I won't quit saying it:  Thanks a million for the comments, e-mails, prayers.  You guys are making this process so much easier on us.