Best Day Ever

This is a two-part good news blog.  You can refer to Dave's post below for part of our good news.  Who am I kidding?  I can't help but repeat it - All 10 of our retrieved eggs were mature and healthy and they all fertilized!!  I was in shock to get that info from Andrea at SIRM today.  I think it is pretty rare for every egg that is retrieved to be mature and fertilize.  We are thrilled.  

As Dave mentioned, we will get another report from Andrea on Thursday.  They will tell us how many have made it to Day-3 embryos and whether we should transfer them to my uterus on that day or wait until Day-5.  We are praying for Day-5 on Saturday.   We have the best chances if we can do that.  

This does not mean I am Deca-Mom (Nish & Holly)!  If all of our little embies make it, we will not transfer every one of them.  I am not a masochist.  We will preserve some of them for the future.

I have to tell on Dave a little bit.  He is going to kill me.  When I got home from Columbia with Mom & Carla, he had the Pottery Barn Kid catalog out on the counter open to a crib that he liked.  I thought it was sweet.  I think he is allowing his hopes to get up . . .  so am I.  It makes me nervous to do so, but we can't help it.  It is human nature.  It is hard not to put all of our eggs in one basket - literally and figuratively.  That was almost a funny little joke.  

But, I can't wait to tell you the best news of the day.  Wait for it . . .  Wait for it . . .  I have to build the anticipation a little.  We got Mom's bone scan, Cat scan, & MUGA scan results from Dr. Perry.  ALL OF MOM'S SCANS CAME BACK NEGATIVE FOR CANCER!!!  We are on cloud nine.  This is the first time that we have received good news since we began this process in December.  Finally!  Today was a very good day.  I think the fertilized eggs lifted her spirits, too.  

She started her first round of chemo today.  It took several hours.  It will take less time each time she returns.  She tolerated it well.  The next few days will be the true test.  She will probably have some nausea, etc.  Our nurse, Ann, gave us a ton of information.  Everyone in charge of Mom's care is very concerned about all of her symptoms - nausea, vomitting, the list goes on.  They gave her medicine in her port today to help fight these issues and they sent her home with some oral prescription meds to help with it.  I was pleased about that. 

They want her to call them when she has any noteworthy symptoms.  Everyone at Ellis Fischel is extremely nice and informative.  She will meet with her medical oncologist, Dr. Perry, every time she goes for chemo.  I love that.  He is great.  They all are.  I am very happy that we chose Ellis Fischel.  Her next chemo infusion is on Tuesday, April 14, and every 2 weeks for a month thereafter.  Then she will continue with chemo every week for at least twelve more weeks.  I will update you regularly on her progress. 

Aunt Carla was there today, too.  Thanks, Carla.  I appreciate your support, and I know Mom does, as well.  You are a great sister.  I know you are going to be a life-saver during this process.  

Thanks, everyone, for uplifting me day after day.  I love ya.

10 for 10

Tish just called me with the news that all 10 eggs were mature and all 10 fertilized. This is more than either of us had dared to hope. Now we wait to see how many make it. Our hope is to have several viable for a 5 day transfer on Saturday.

10 EGGS

Today was the big egg retrieval.  I was sedated this morning at the Sher Institute for Reproductive Medicine (SIRM - Dr. A's office) and Dr. A used an ultrasound-guided needle to go in through my vagina/uterus to aspirate the fluid off of both ovaries to remove my eggs.  

While we were still in the office, we got a verbal report relayed from the embryologist in the lab that they retrieved 10 eggs!  I was so happy to hear this.  It was such a relief.  

This afternoon, in the lab, the embryologist studied the eggs, and used the ICSI procedure and Dave's sperm to fertilize all of the mature eggs.  They may decide that some eggs were not healthy enough to fertilize.  Tomorrow, I will get a call from Andrea with a fertilization report.  She will tell me how many eggs they were able to fertilize.  Then we wait.  This is a huge waiting game.  

They will look at the embryos again on Thursday to see how many are still developing.  I will get a phone call on Thursday, too.  There is a good possibility that all of the fertilized eggs will not survive until Thursday.  If there are several on Thursday, we will let them develop until Saturday.  Even fewer will probably make it to Saturday.  But the embryos/blastocysts that make it to Saturday will be the healthiest/heartiest ones.  They will be the most likely to sustain a healthy pregnancy.  

I am praying for at least two healthy blastocysts that are available for a Saturday transfer.  If we have more than 2 healthy blastocysts on Saturday, we will probably only transfer 2 and freeze the rest.  It really depends on the status of said blastocysts.  I will pass along all of the details.

For some reason, I was not completely sedated during the entire procedure today.  I remember part of it and a couple of times it actually hurt.  What an experience.  An embarrassing part of the entire process was the fact that I immediately started crying like a baby when I woke up.  

Dave told me that when he first saw me as they rolled me back into the recovery room where he was waiting, he thought they told me bad news.  He thought that my tears were a reaction to something that went wrong during the procedure.  

I just kept telling everyone that I had no idea why I was crying.  I was still crying as they wheeled me out to the car.  How embarrassing.  I absolutely had no control over it.  I couldn't stop the tears from rolling down my face.  That is a reaction to anesthesia that I have never experienced.  I usually get very happy and chatty.  

I think we were on the road to Kirksville by noon.  I ate something and slept on an off the entire ride home.  I felt loopy most of the afternoon/evening - and very tired.  I have been relaxing in bed since about 4 pm, just watching TV and sitting on the laptop.

I feel a little bit of abdominal bloating and pain, but nothing major.  Apparently, it is likely that I may be very uncomfortable tomorrow.  I am thinking positive thoughts to try to prevent this.  

I start a new shot this evening.  This one is intramuscular (IM).  Yeay!  That is sarcasm.  It is progesterone.  I only have to take it every 3 days, so that is a bonus, but I may have to continue this one for some time if I do become pregnant.  

Thanks for reading!  

Countdown to Egg Retrieval

My big egg retrieval is tomorrow morning.  I am excited and nervous.  I can't eat anything after midnight tonight, because I will be under anesthesia tomorrow.  So, Dave and I loaded up on Imo's Pizza.  Yummy!  We have to be at Dr. A's office at 9:15 and the procedure will take place at 10:15.  I think we will be leaving St. Louis by 2:00 at the latest, hopefully sooner. 

Today is the first day since March 3rd that I have not had an injection!  I can't believe that I survived 25 straight days of injections.  They will start again soon, unfortunately.  But, it will all be worth it.  

I mentioned in an earlier post that the daily dexamethasone (steroid) pill that I take has been wreaking havoc on my sleep.  Dr. A prescribed sleeping pills to help with this, and they work great.  I decided to not take a sleeping pill last night to see if I could sleep without it.  I tossed and turned for 3 hours before falling asleep.  FRUSTRATING!

My coordinator, Andrea, told me that I will continue to take the dexamethasone until we get a negative pregnancy test or several weeks into pregnancy - depending on how this turns out.  This is a huge concern for me.  I think I need to talk to Dr. A about it tomorrow.  I really do not wish to take sleeping pills long term.  I will probably discontinue the sleeping pills prior to the embryo transfer, because they are a pregnancy category C drug, meaning they are not safe during pregnancy.  

So, I'm not sure how the sleep issue will turn out, but I can't function on 5 hours per night - every night.  We'll figure something out.  

Wish me luck tomorrow.

Follicles Finally in a Row . . . Like Ducks

We saw Dr. Ahlering this morning for an ultrasound, and he gave us great news.  We had about nine large follicles that measured anywhere from 12 to 21 mm.  They took their time getting there, but they are finally ready for the hCG injection this evening. So, tonight at exactly 10:15 pm, Dave will give me an injection of hCG (human chorionic gonadotropin).  This matures my eggs and follicles to completion and allows the eggs to be released from the follicles.  

We will have our egg retrieval exactly 36 hours later - Monday morning at 10:15 am.  I will be placed under anesthesia.  It is a very simple procedure with usually only mild cramping afterward.  An ultrasound-guided needle is passed vaginally to each ovary.  The follicle fluid is aspirated with the needle and collected in a test tube.  The eggs will be found in the aspirated fluid.  It is delivered to the embryologist in the lab.  As soon as we are done, Dave will drive us home.  

The embryologist in the lab will fertilize each egg with a procedure called ICSI (intracytoplasmic sperm injection).  They inject one of Dave's sperm (sorry if that is too much info) into each of my eggs to fertilize them.  This helps to ensure that each egg will become fertilized.  The embryos will be allowed to mature at least 3 days.  Dr. Ahlering suggested today that we just plan on a day-5 blastocyst transfer.  

So, our intent is to return to St. Louis Friday evening and complete the embryo transfer sometime on Saturday.  I will be on "bed rest" for 24 hours after the embryo transfer and they recommend limited physical activity for about 2 weeks thereafter.  They said that Dave can drive me home immediately after the procedure.  When talking to Andrea, my coordinator, today, she said that there is still a chance we may need to do the day-3 embryo transfer.  So, we will be ready to make a mad dash to St. Louis on Thursday, if necessary.  

Tonight, after the Mizzou game, Dave and I are going to see Cirque Dreams at the Fox Theater.  I am excited about it.  He is indifferent.  I know he will love it.  It is a spin-off of Cirque de Solei.  I will let you know how it goes.  

MIZZOU IS BEATING UCONN!!!  (Sorry for that lapse in concentration.  We are watching the game right now.)

I have more good news.  I get to go to Columbia with Mom Tuesday, March 31, for her first chemo appointment.  I have been hoping that the IVF schedule would allow me to go with her on Tuesday.  My aunt Carla will be going, too.  We will be getting test results from the Cat Scan, MUGA Scan, bone scan, so I really wanted to be there.  I will let you know how that goes, too.  

Again, thanks for reading.  We both appreciate your support.

George Clooney is Stalking Us

Yes, that is right.  George Clooney is a huge fan of mine.  He "just so happened" to be in Rome at his movie premiere for Michael Clayton just a few blocks from our hotel when Dave and I were there in September 2007.  And he "just so happened" to be filming his movie three blocks away from my acupuncturist's office in Manchester today.  My friend, Foster, told me that he was filming a movie in St. Louis, but I didn't know we would happen upon the set.  Dave and I walked down the street and hung out with the groupies for a few minutes and got a few pictures of the set, but we didn't wait around to see him.  

You would not believe how many huge trucks, campers, trailers there were littered around the entire neighborhood.  He was filming in or around a church.  They sprayed fake snow all over the place.  My acupuncturist's husband (he is a chiropractor in the same office) told us that the fake snow is paper.  It looked pretty real.  He also told Dave that George is a tiny little man with a huge head.  I thought that was funny.  I am attaching a few pictures. 

It turns out that neither Dave nor I won our little bet.  It turns out that Dr. A won.  He wants to see me back on Saturday and he thinks I will probably get the hCG injection that day.  I had about 9 follicles that looked great today.  They measured from 12 - 17 mm.  My uterine lining looked good, too.  Everything is going well, but just taking its sweet time.  So, I have two additional days of Lupron and Gonal-F injections and they added a Luveris injection in there for good measure.  He thinks the egg retrieval will be Monday sometime.  That would place the embryo transfer on Thursday or Saturday of next week.

So, we have decided to just hang out in St. Louis until at least Monday.  We have no agenda.  That is hard for me.  We will eat like pigs.  We will wander around some malls and other stores.  We will find something cultural to do.  It will be fun.  I will keep you posted.

The Heart of Life is Good

Life has been a little uneventful over the past couple of days.  Dave and & I went home Monday night.  I worked on my to-do list most of the day Tuesday, but I also got a nap in during the afternoon.  That was great.  I went to the office for an hour and a half Tuesday night.  It seems that everything is going well there.  This afternoon Dave and I repacked and came back to Creve Coeur.  Of all of the nice restaurants in St. Louis, we ate at Buffalo Wild Wings.  We had dessert at Cold Stone.  We love that place.

We have an appointment for a blood draw, ultrasound, and acupuncture tomorrow morning.  I will let you know what we learn.  For the record, Dave and I have a bet.  I need witnesses.  I always win our bets and he doesn't allow me to have bragging rights.  I bet him that Dr. A. will say that my follicles look great tomorrow and he will order the hCG injection tomorrow.  Dave thinks that Dr. A. will order the hCG injection Friday.  hCG is given approximately 36 hours prior to the egg retrieval.  It causes the follicles in my ovaries to rupture, releasing the eggs (ovulation).  I'm sure you can't wait to learn who wins - that was sarcasm.  I will let you know.  

I want to explain the title of my post.  I had a 3 1/2 hour drive home by myself Monday night.  I love more than anything to listen to all of my favorite songs and sing like a mad woman on solo car trips like that.  The people I pass on the interstate must think I am insane.  I am a huge fan of music.  It makes me happy.  I love lyrics.  I would love to know every word to every song if I could. 

I am a huge fan of the music of John Mayer.  I think that Mr. Mayer himself might be a bit of a social reject . . .  dork . . .  tool - but he is certainly a lyrical genius.  In my opinion, John Mayer, Jack Johnson, and Dave Matthews are all lyrical geniuses.  Their music brings joy to my life.  Dave adamantly disagrees with me on this.  We have complete opposite taste in music.  That is beside the point.  I am sorry it is taking me so long to get where I am going with this.

Have you ever heard the song "Heart of Life" by John Mayer??  If you don't have the Continuum CD, look it up on itunes.  It is a great song.  I feel that it sums up my life right now.  I want to share the lyrics from "Heart of Life" that touch my soul.  

You know it's nothing new

Bad news never had good timing

But then the circle of your friends

Will defend the silver lining

Pain throws your heart to the ground

Love turns the whole thing around

No, it won't all go the way it should

But I know the heart of life is good

The lyrics don't do it justice.  You should listen to the actual song.  I know it will touch you, too.  I interpret it to mean that even when you go through difficult times in life, there are always people around to support and love you.  They will defend that silver lining.  That is what makes life good.  

The heart of life is good.  I am appreciating that more and more every day.  I have so many blessings.  I am lucky.  I am genuinely happy.  I'm sorry if I am being too emotional or sentimental.  I am loaded up on hormones right now.  I have no control over it.  I appreciate the support that I have been receiving from each of you.  Thanks.

Cycle Day 9 Update

Although today is the 20th day of my daily injections, today is called "Cycle Day 9" of my IVF cycle. It's a little confusing (as all of this is), so I thought I should explain that title. It is called Cycle Day 9 because it is the 9th day of my cycle. I have a feeling that hasn't cleared anything up . . . sorry. I don't know how to explain it in a more precise way. Anyway, today was a big day. Here are the details - in order.

Estradiol (E2) Blood Draw

At 8 am, Dave and I headed to Quest Laboratory one building down from Dr. Ahlering's office to have my blood drawn. The purpose was to test my estradiol levels. Dr. A was going to get the results today, but I just realized I haven't heard from my coordinator how it turned out. I will e-mail her tomorrow. The estradiol levels give info regarding the response of my ovaries to the hormones. It is one of the clues that Dr. A uses to determine my injection dosages for the next few days. If my E2 levels are low, they usually increase the dosages, because there is a small window of time to get my eggs to mature to proper size. It is an exact science for Dr. A to get everything tweeked just right.

Ultrasound

At 8:30 am, we hopped over to Dr. A's office to have a vaginal ultrasound. Dr. A looked at the lining of my uterus and the number and size of follicles in my ovaries. To state it simply, he said that my uterine lining looks good. It is supposed to be getting fairly thick - and it is. Dr. A failed to mention exactly how many follicles were developing, but we saw them. It seemed to me that there were several, probably 10-12. They were all a little smaller than he had hoped. They measured between 10-12 mm each. They are mature somewhere between 17-25 mm, it is preferred for them to grow about 2 mm per day. So, he increased my dosage of Gonal-F for tonight and tomorrow night from 225 IU to 600 IU. It sucked. 

Just as a reminder, an egg is produced inside each follicle in my ovary. This is a picture of someone else's ovary I found on the internet, but mine looked similar. The big round black blobs are the follicles. They usually are all different sizes. They don't mature at the exact same rate.

Intralipid IV Infusion

After the ultrasound, my nurse coordinator, Andrea, started an IV in my right wrist. She gave me Intralipid. It was very cold and it hurt quite a bit. It took about 20 minutes. The IV site is still sore tonight. The purpose of the Intralipid is to suppress my immune system. As I mentioned in previous posts, I have elevated levels of a couple of different immune cell types (Natural Killer Cells and another that has escaped me) that promote immediate pregnancy loss. If I do become pregnant, I will have at least one more Intralipid IV. Dave took a few pictures during the infusion.

Acupuncture

I saw Christine Kleinschmidt, a license acupuncturist, to have my first acupuncture session. She was great. It was a nice experience. She used 17 of those little needles. She placed them in my left ear, my chest, my left wrist, my belly, my left leg, and the top of my left foot. I felt them as she placed them, but it never hurt. Once she placed the needles, she left me to relax "on a beach" for about 35 minutes. After about 20 minutes, I started to feel tingly, warm and very relaxed. It was unexpected, but I did feel a physical change. I am returning to see her Thursday, as well. I felt pretty relaxed the rest of the evening.

As a result of my appointment with Dr. A today, he doesn't want to see me back until Thursday morning, March 26th. Usually, they would want to see me sooner, but my follicles are not cooperating. He wants to wait until they are bigger. So, we came home to Kirksville tonight. Dave and I each had a separate car, so he left at about 2:30 prior to my acupuncture appointment and I left at about 4:45. 

I am sitting in my own bed as I write this on my laptop. I am going back to St. Louis Wednesday afternoon. I told Dave he can stay home and work Thursday and Friday if he wants to, but I think he is still debating. Dr. A said that the egg retrieval will probably be Sunday. That is later than they originally expected. My prediction is that it will be Friday or Saturday. I know my eggs and once they are given a boost, they do work quickly! This scenario has happened before. We'll see. It is time for me to get some sleep. I will catch up with you all tomorrow.

Wonderful Weekend

On this lazy Sunday afternoon, I am writing from our hotel room in St. Louis.  I had a fantastic weekend with my wonderful friends here in St. Louis.  Foster was very hospitable, as usual.  We saw I Love You, Man Saturday afternoon at the Moolah Theater.  The Moolah is an old Masonic Temple that has been converted into a movie theater with huge couches.  It has a bar - you can drink alcoholic beverages while watching a movie.  There is a bowling alley, pool tables, etc.  It was fun and the movie was hilarious.  This weekend was just what I needed.  Thanks, ladies - & Foster.

By the way, while Dave wasn't around, Ranina gave me my shots - a total of 3 of them.  She did an outstanding job.  Thanks, Ranina.  I really didn't want to do it myself.  You are awesome.  

Both Friday and today are the dreaded days that require a total of 3 different injections.  Every other day this week I had an injection of Lupron in the morning and an injection of Gonal-F in the evening.  Before I left Kirksville Friday evening, Dave gave me a horrible injection of Luveris, too.  We have to do it again this evening.  I hated it.  It is the worst one yet.  Oh well.  It is all worth it.

Again, the agenda for tomorrow (Monday) is blood work to test my estradiol levels, an ultrasound, an IV of Intralipid, and acupuncture.  I have been feeling very positive about everything . . .  but I am also so nervous.  I'm not nervous about any of the procedures.  That is a piece of cake.  I am nervous about the possibility of another downward turn on the rollercoaster if this IVF cycle doesn't work.  

I know.  I know.  I shouldn't worry about something that hasn't happened, but I am just giving you an honest peak at how I feel.  I am reserving a little of my excitement.  I'm sorry.  I feel like I am letting everyone down a little bit.  It is a protective mechanism OR being a realist OR post traumatic stress.  I don't know.  I'm trying to feel ONLY positive thoughts, but there are always those feelings of anxiety looming.  Luckily, Dave will be here to override the anxiety.  He is good at that.  I'll update you tomorrow evening - and every evening this week.

Weekend . . . Here I Come!

If I can get through a very busy day of work today, I am going to have a fun-filled weekend ahead of me. I am meeting my girlfriends: Angie, Melissa, Missy, Ranina, Davye and we are traveling to St. Louis for some much-needed girl time. We will be staying at Foster's condo. He has all kinds of fun stuff planned for us. I can't wait! We always have such a great time. Inevitably, my abs will be sore from all of the laughing.

When all of the girls come home on Sunday, I will be staying in St. Louis. Dave is coming down Sunday afternoon. We have our first monitoring appointment with Dr. Ahlering Monday. I am having bloodwork to check my estradiol levels, an ultrasound to check the development of my follicles, an IV of Intralipid (to suppress my immune system) and I am seeing an accupuncturist. It will be a busy day. We are staying in a hotel in Creve Coeur, a couple of block from Dr. Ahlering's office.

I actually have two full weeks off of work. I can't believe it. I may get to come home for a few days here and there, but I will be in St. Louis the majority of the next two weeks. Dave will be back and forth the entire time. I will start updating my blog daily on Monday, because a lot will be happening. This is it!! Dave and I were talking last night about how excited we are. I can't believe we are actually finally doing IVF?! I'm sure that all of your prayers will work.

St. Patrick's Day 5K

I just wanted to share some pictures from the St. Patrick's Day 5K that I ran today with some friends.  We had a great time and shared some green beer afterwards.  I didn't make my personal goal, but who cares.  It was fun, the weather was great.  

Dave came for moral support and to take pictures.  I can't get him to run with us, but he comes to most of my races to show support.

This is after the race.  I look like crap, but I'm always proud to finish a race.

These are my awesome running mates:  Megan Baugh, Katie Perkins, Danae McKim.

New Drug

Tonight Dave & I added an injection of Gonal-F to our daily drug routine.  It required the use of a 27-gauge needle and 225 IU of the actual drug.  It wasn't pleasant.  We tried a new injection site - the ever-famous ass.  I seem to have plenty of fat there.  I have bruises all over my stomach, so I thought we would try something new.  It still hurt.  And it took forever!  I make him inject the medicine slowly.  He had a hard time breaking the skin with the slightly bigger needle - the insulin syringes we are using for the Lupron are smaller.  

The purpose of Gonal-F is to stimulate the formation of eggs in my ovaries.  I have taken Follistim previously, and it is another brand of the same drug.  I had mood swings, bloating, and a full feeling in my lower abdomen with Follistim.  I expect the same with Gonal-F.

I got a prescription for generic Ambien today.  In case you don't know, it is a sleeping pill.  I am having some significant trouble sleeping, so I broke down and asked for help.  I am looking forward to a full 8 hours tonight.  

Just to update you, the daily drug total is as follows:

.75 mg dexamethasone (steroid pill)

prenatal vitamin

Lupron injection

Gonal-F injection

Ambien (sleeping pill) as needed

It doesn't seem too bad so far.  Dave and I are notably more grouchy with each other, but we will get through it.  I would like to share some photos with you.  

Uneventful

I'm sorry that I haven't posted for several days.  There's not much to post about.  Dave and I made an early morning trip to Columbia Thursday morning.  Dr. Ahlering requested blood work to test my estradiol levels.  The blood had to be drawn prior to 9 am and the results needed to be sent to Dr. Ahlering prior to the end of the day.  The lab in Kirksville could not get same-day results, so we had to go to Columbia.  

Dave and I both blocked off our mornings and left the house at 6:30 am in order to get to Boone Hospital around 8 am.  I gave explicit instructions to the lab tech that the results had to be faxed the same day and they explained that they could and would do that.  It also gave those same instructions directly on the orders.  I received an e-mail the next morning from my coordinator at the Sher Institute, Andrea, asking if I had my blood drawn the previous morning.  

I was annoyed.  It turns out the lab didn't send the results and when I called the lab at Boone Hospital Friday morning to sort it out, the lady I talked to took at least five minutes to find my results.  I guess they had no intention of ever sending them.  I was frustrated.  Andrea said it didn't make much of a difference.  So, I then wondered why I had to do it in the first place.  

I guess it was just a minor snag.  I shouldn't let it bother me.  But for some reason it does bother me.  Serenity now.  Serenity now.

Dave is still stabbing me with a syringe of Lupron every morning and tomorrow we start with an additional evening shot of Gonal-F.  I'll let you know how that goes.  

I also realized I made an error in my last blog.  I typed that Mom's Port-A-Cath will go in on May 16th.  It will actually go in tomorrow, Monday, March 16th.  

Oleva Riney . . . One Strong Lady

This post is going to be all about my mom, Oleva Riney. I am so proud of her. The two of us spent a big chunk of time at Ellis Fischel yesterday. We met with Dr. Dale (oncology surgeon), Dr. Perry (medical oncologist), & Dr. Westgate (radiation oncologist).

Dr. Dale informed us that there were no cancerous cells in the breast tissue removed last week - good news. He also told us that there was cancer in 5 out of 13 lymph nodes that were removed - bad news.

Dr. Perry told us that she has Stage III metastatic ductal cell carcinoma. He recommended chemo and radiation. He also recommended that she join a clinical trial testing a promising new chemo drug that has already been approved for other forms of cancer. She is going to have a Port-A-Cath placed Monday, March 16 at the University Hospital. This will be used to give her chemo drugs.

Chemo will start about 4 weeks from now and last until September. Prior to chemo, further tests will be completed: CAT scan, bone scan, MUGA scan. Chemo will begin four weeks from now and be completed at Ellis Fischel. She will have an appointment every other week for 8 weeks and then weekly for 12 weeks. There is a possibility that she may continue with an appointment once every three weeks for 30 weeks following this. It depends on the drug trial. Of course, the side effects of chemo vary from person to person, but usually have a significant affect on quality of life - temporarily.

Dr. Westgate explained radiation treatment. It will most likely begin sometime in September. It takes about 15 minutes for each appointment. It is done daily Monday thru Friday for 6 weeks at the George Ray Cancer Center in Kirksville.

In a word . . . OVERWHELMING.

Mom is doing great. Her attitude is great. She wants to fight this and do everything that is recommended of her doctors. She is having pain in her left arm following last week's surgery. The pain is more associated with the removal of lymph nodes than anything else. The doctors want this to heal a little more prior to chemo. Mom, I know you are mortified that this entire post is all about you. Sorry, but that is how things are going to be for a while.

I tried to put myself in her shoes yesterday. I couldn't do it. I have no idea how it feels to have breast cancer. I can think of some words, but I'm not sure they do it justice. They are just words. Some words that are more important are the words that describe Oleva: strong, determined, powerful. I am confident the outcome will be great, but it will be a long road. She will get through it with a lot of support.

Truckin' Along

This morning I have successfully completed 7 days worth of Lupron injections in addition to the dexamethasone. I started sleeping better over the weekend, and I do not feel nearly as loopy from the hormones. I do know that I was very grouchy with Dave for the first few days which led to him them becoming grouchy with me. I accused him of being hormonal. That did not go over very well.

He is doing a great job managing the meds and giving me my injections. He hates the tiny insulin needles that we are using with the Lupron. He mumbles something about them not being lubricated. There were actual curse words this morning. We have been doing the Lupron shots in my abdomen and he actually says that I don't have enough fat there. I don't know what he is smoking, but it is nice to hear that from your hubby every morning.

I am going to Columbia with Mom today to meet with chemotherapy, radiation, and Dr. Dale, her oncologist. We will have a treatment plan in place the next time I post. I will let you know the details soon. You might get tired of reading this, but thanks again for the e-mails, cards, phone calls. You are all so amazing. My spirits get uplifted by a couple of people every day.

Our Cycle Has Started

As you may have read in Dave's post yesterday, our IVF cycle officially started yesterday, Wednesday, March 4. We started yesterday with an injection of Lupron and a .75mg dexamethasone (steroid) pill. Lupron is a very complicated drug. I am still a little unclear of the mechanism of action. I believe that Lupron suppresses the pituitary gland's ability to produce FSH (follicle-stimulating hormone) and LH (luteinizing hormone). This "turns off" my ovaries so that Dr. Ahlering can control my ovulation with gonadotropins (Gonal-F) and other hormones (coming soon).

The reported side effects of the steroids are increased appetite, bloating, and sleep loss. I already had serious trouble sleeping last night. That is the side effect that will rock my world the most. Work was crazy busy today (a good thing), and I usually take that in stride. The lack of sleep compounded with the Lupron (the main side effects are MOOD SWINGS) and busy work day completely overwhelmed me. This is only Day 2.

I was supposed to run 9 miles after work today with Katie in this beautiful 70 degree weather, but I reluctantly chose to decline. Sorry, Katie! Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day. I am going to bed early tonight. I feel completely exhausted. I know, I know, it will only get worse with a newborn baby - or two.

I am having to dig very deep this week for those positive feelings I was bragging about a couple of weeks ago. All of the positive messages, flowers, cards, and phone calls are so appreciated. You all know who you are. Your support is getting me through this. I love you.

Well, I guess this is actually going to happen. Tish started on her injectables today. I finally have something to contribute. I am the wielder of syringes for the next 3 weeks. We're only on one injectable for the first few days, but soon this is going to get confusing. I may have to take some vacation time just to organize the drugs.

Metastatic Breast Cancer

We went to Columbia today for Mom's surgery. We received very bad news. There were cancer cells in 2 lymph nodes, so they removed all of the major lymph nodes associated with her left breast. They also removed tissue around the previously biopsied area. Dr. Dale told us that she must have chemo followed by external beam radiation. She is probably going to have further testing done to determine the extent of the metastasis, possibly a PET Scan, bone scan, who knows what else. They are going to test the lymph nodes and breast tissue to determine the extent of cancer. We will get these results and a more detailed treatment plan on Tuesday, March 10. Thanks for all of your prayers and well-wishes. I passed it all on to her.